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Divorce: Is your ex trying to turn your kids against you?

On Behalf of | Jan 30, 2020 | Parental Alienation

Maybe you and your former spouse have always argued about your children. In fact, it might have played a big part in your decision to divorce. Then again, perhaps, child-related issues were not all that relevant to the breakdown in your marriage, but you’ve encountered obstacles since then regarding child custody. You likely assumed that your spouse would be willing to cooperate and compromise to develop a peaceful co-parenting plan in a New Jersey court.

It might not have taken long for you to realize that things weren’t going to go as smoothly as you’d initially hoped. You might have a court order in place with detailed instructions of child custody and visitation plus other important issues regarding your children. If your spouse refuses to adhere to the terms, serious problems can arise, especially if you believe a parental alienation plot is at hand.

What might your spouse’s objective be?

The main goal of a parental alienation scheme is typically to get a child to reject his or her parent. If this is happening in your life, you might notice changes in your relationship with your child or children. Perhaps, in the past, you’ve always described your parent/children relationships as close-knit and loving. Since your divorce, you might have noticed that one or more of your kids are becoming hostile toward you.

That’s definitely a sign that your ex might be up to no good and that he or she is trying to drive a wedge between you and your kids. The underlying reasons for such schemes may vary. It might have to do with revenge or a way to get children to say they don’t want to live with their other parent anymore.

More issues that often occur in parental alienation

Your children might grow hostile toward you if their other parent is unleashing a parental alienation scheme against you. You might even learn that they have been saying things about you that aren’t true based on what their other parent has said. Kids who are victims of parental alienation schemes might begin to mistrust a parent if the other parent involved is telling them that he or she is untrustworthy.

If your spouse is always speaking negatively about you in front of your children, it might be on purpose. Has your spouse tried to deny you access to your kids? That’s another sure sign that you might be dealing with a parental alienation problem.

A form of emotional abuse

When you decided to divorce, you no doubt considered your children’s best interests one of your top priorities. Parental alienation is a concerning issue because it is a type of emotional abuse. While a family court judge must be cautious when reviewing a case that includes allegations from one parent against the other, signs of emotional or physical abuse or neglect warrant further investigation.

What is most important in a divorce involving children?

You and your ex might have had some serious marital problems. It can take a long time to heal when the hurt runs deep. However, although your ex might have feelings of anger or malice toward you, it does not excuse a systematic attempt to turn your children against you. The court typically believes that children of divorce fare best when they maintain active, healthy relationships with both parents.

If your co-parent is disobeying an existing New Jersey court order or if you’re having trouble resolving child custody issues because of a suspected parental alienation scheme, you shouldn’t hesitate to reach out for additional support to help you protect your rights and your children’s best interests.